Changes

I'm almost positive that daughter will end up back living with me sometime over the next few weeks. The situation at her mum's seems simply far too unstable for me to believe her mum and mum's boyfriend are going to stay together for much longer.

This has been at the back of my mind for a while but it's only now I've admitted it. If she does come back for good, this should be the catalyst for me to get a proper job, apply for a council house and any benefits that we might be entitled to, get ourselves sorted for a normal life instead of this poor substitute, where there's no space or storage or possessions or freedom to do things which involve money. I'd like two bedrooms, please, and two double beds. A living room, my own kitchen. Maybe a little garden for herbs and tomatoes. How about becoming someone who's succeeding in life and might even attract a lady friend - I'm ready now. I'd love to take on the responsibility for running a household, saving money for bills and those little emergencies which appear from time to time. I'd like to feel I'm providing the best for my daughter and for myself, whereas for the past year or two I've been doing just enough to get by and not much else.

On reflection, this ambition should stand whether daughter comes to live or not. Aim higher, do better, earn more, do more, achieve what you want.

Wise hypno-prick says 'If you just keep doing what you've always done, you'll just get more of what you've already got.' I've applied this theory to my diet and alcohol intake and achieved great things with it. Maybe it's time to apply it to my whole life.